November is here... has to be my least favorite time of year! Up until a few days ago I had a very positive outlook for this year, I was going to get thru it with a good attitude and leave the past where it belongs. But with relationships the way they are currently- family and friends, I'm not sure. November 1st- I woke up, looked out the window, and saw snow. Great start, right? So many bad memories of November- I truly wish I could skip both November and December! I dread the thought of Thanksgiving getting here... but it has to be, and I can't change it. In the past I have hidden from the day- stay home, drink, and send the husband and kid off to do whatever it is the family invites them to do. But this year I have agreed to go to dinner with my mother in law... I hope I dont fall apart! I try so hard to keep up appearances and make my husband happy- I know how much he loves his family, but I usually only last a short time before the emotional break.
November- amazing childhood memories that can never again be... wonderful memories of former in-laws- that will never again be... the loss of family... the loss of dear friends... the loss of a child... and the loss of freedom. Can I, will I ever be able to overcome all this and enjoy Thanksgiving like I once did?